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The Bachelor Season-Premiere Recap: Kiss the Girls


Did Joey just set a first-night smooch record?

I tried to watch Paradise and gave up halfway through the season when no one was jumping at the chance to snag a petite, curvy Bachelorette at a discount. I feel like she’s hitting a lot of quadrants on the “Bachelor Contestant Personality Matrix.” I’m not entirely convinced that an AI didn’t pull her application out of the pile. She takes it to Joey and cries about how she doesn’t want to do that to the amazing vintage store owners and Christmas tree heiresses she just met.

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