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Glasgow’s Sad Oompa Loompa Isn’t Gonna Sugarcoat This


“I don’t know how else you can put sprinkles on shit, but we were trying to be the sprinkles on shit.”

Whether it be 2017’s infamous Fyre Festival, 2014’s sad ball pit at Dashcon, or last year’s muddy hike for freedom at Burning Man, we love to marvel at events that make big promises but flop spectacularly. Organized by House of Illuminati, whose AI-heavy website promotes the company as a place where “fantasy and reality converge,” the event was advertised as an immersive experience for families themed around the classic Roald Dahl novel and movie franchise (and with tickets that cost up to $44). It show an actor wearing the Shein equivalent of an Oompa Loompa costume and looking slightly dead in the eyes as she stands in a smoky room behind a table covered in so much scientific equipment that countless people online compared it to a “meth lab.”

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